There has been a video circulating around the internet of Ciara, her husband Russell Wilson and her 2-year-old son Future. I wasn’t gonna write about this but I keep seeing it in my newsfeed and it just won’t go away. In the video, baby Future affectionately calls his new stepdad Russell, Papa and Russell gives him a kiss on the cheek. It was like a bomb dropped.
Every man on the planet, whether they had kids or not, was pissed. These are some of the reactions I saw.
“Oh hell no, no child of mine is calling another man Papa.”
“Nah, why is he kissing him on the mouth (it was the cheek but everyone was so dramatic)?”
“That’s so disrespectful!”
“Ciara is being petty towards Future.”
“That child is too young to decide what name he wants to call someone.”
“Ciara does everything for show. She’s corny.”
People have been going back and forth about this for DAYS. I love a good debate at times so I joined in. I’m in between a rock and a hard place because I will be in Ciara’s shoes one of these days. I am a single mother who plans to get married in the future. My son will have a stepfather and depending on how old he is, he or I will have to figure out what he will call him. It’s a touchy subject because I was asked if I would be comfortable with my son calling another woman ‘Mom’. I had to pause for a second because at this point in my life, no I would not. My child is only a year old though. I am still trying to teach him how to say the word mom LOL.
Right now, I say that it is a case by case basis. If my son was 14 years old and the only man he knows is his biological father and I get married, calling my husband by his first name would be completely fine. On the other hand, if his father hasn’t been in his life in 14 years and he wants to call his stepfather “Dad”, that would be his choice. If I get married when my son is four years old, we will figure out as a unit what he will call his new stepdad. Obviously, Ciara made a decision to allow her son to call Russell “Papa”. Maybe he calls Future Dad or Daddy. We don’t know and honestly we wouldn’t even care if we never saw this video. Everyone has the right to do what works best for their family.
I also think that stepparents can be a blessing to children. If a person genuinely loves your kids as if they were their own and helps take care of them in your absence, you should appreciate that person for that. Nobody should be trying to replace anyone’s mother or father though. You have to know what lines not to cross and always respect the biological parent. It looks like Russell and baby Future have a tight little bond and now that he is his stepson, their relationship will continue to grow. Remember people, this isn’t just some guy Ciara is dating or messing with. They are married now and he is helping to raise her son as his own. He probably respects Future as his father and maybe they established their own set of boundaries. We don’t know – we only know what they show us. In the meantime, make your own rules for your kids and try to have open communication with their stepparents if possible. At the end of the day, it’s all about what’s in the best interest of the child.
Photo source: Ciara’s Instagram